Night of the Crazy Teen

Who needs to go on a roller coaster ride when they live with a teenager. Usually when I write my blogs, I think about what may help my readers. However, I admit that I'm writing this one so that I don't spontaneously combust after having another head to head encounter with my teenager.

I know I'm not the only one at this moment and time in this universe who is inches away from taking an argument into a tailspin of no return so I'm taking a breather to review what my intellect should know, but what my emotions won't allow me to do.

Here are some helpful reminders from the very sensible Public Health Agency of Canada.

• --It is important for parents to see the instability in the teen's behavior as part of the teen's development in separating from his or her parents. In other words, it's normal.

• --The last thing an out-of-control teen needs is an out-of-control parent. Parents should ask themselves "How do I behave when I'm angry at my teen? Would I want my teen to imitate me?"

• --Teens are out of balance at the same time as their parents are struggling with their own mid-life pressures, not to mention the holiday stresses.

• --We need to help our teens control their anger and express it safely especially their anger at parents. Remember that feelings like helplessness, hurt, frustration, confusion and guilt are often expressed as anger. Does the teen have a safe way of expressing his anger safely? He can stomp off to his room, pound the pillow, but not yell or hit

• --Remember to listen to the teen twice as long as you talk.

There are more tips to read but this gives us the idea. There are some suggested readings : Fleming, Don. How to Stop the Battle with Your Teenager. Toronto: Prentice-Hall Press, 1989, and Patterson, Gerald and Marion Forgatch. Parents and Adolescents Living Together: Part I. Eugene, OR. Castalia Publishing Co, 1987.

These may seem outdated at first glance but clearly the tortured teenage dilemma is time-less.

Photo: courtesy of add-um-g. Please note these teenagers are innocent bystanders to my post.